Not really sure I want to post my thoughts to the general public so I guess I won't advertise that I am writing again. If you are reading this, please don't bother leaving a comment. I don't think I'll be checking for them. And I don't really think anyone will be reading. I am such a perfectionist that it makes me not want to write at all. But here I go anyway because it is what I need to do and because it is something I want to teach my children to do.
I have started a bible study/ book club group based on good morning girls website about the Ministry of Motherhood. I am enjoying it so far though not doing a good job of spending daily time in the word. I think three out of five is what I did this week. It is not that I don't talk with my Father but I don't seem to consistently set aside time with Him each day. I cherish those times which is why I often wonder why I don't do it more. That is because there are people in my life and work to do. Three precious boys and one man, all who want and need my attention as well. Then there is the tired factor that creeps in when I have spent all my attention on caring for others and forgot to care for myself as I needed to. I often get frustrated that on weeks like this when I am serving others I seem to crash and then have a lull in serving because I am so tired. I would love to keep up the pace. I will ask Father for endurance and for a memory to care for myself as I need. Tiredness is something that I think can be changed and work on. This is what leads me to my new study.
I have really got to be abiding in God. He is the source of all power. If I want to live to please him I must be a part of Him, never separating from Him. I need constant reminders. I want God to abide in me so I must abide in Him. Then I will have a steady reminder. Seeking the kingdom of God first must be my goal, my life. I want this. I want to make the changes in my life necessary to help me do better with this.